A Notebook and Expectations: Or Romance vs. Disappointment

Great Expectations (1998)Finn: I did it! I did it! I am a wild success! I sold 'em all, all my paintings. You don't have to be embarrassed by me anymore, I'm rich! Isn't that what you wanted, aren't we happy now. Don't you understand, that everything I do, I do it for you. Anything, that might be special in me, is you.

Finn: The night all of my dreams came true, and like all happy endings,It was a tragedy, Of my device, for I succeeded. I had cut myself loose from Joe, from the past, from the gulf, from poverty I had invented myself. I'd done it cruelly, but I had done it. I was free!

Estella: Let's say there was a little girl, and from the time she could understand, she was taught to fear... let's say she was taught to fear daylight. She was taught that it was her enemy, that it would hurt her. And then one sunny day, you ask her to go outside and play and she won't. You can't be angry at her can you?

The Notebook (2004) Duke (in voice-over narration): "I am no one special, just a common man with common thoughts. I've led a common life. There are no monuments dedicated to me, and my name will soon be forgotten. But in one respect, I've succeeded as gloriously as anyone who ever lived. I've loved another with all my heart and soul, and for me, that has always been enough."

Duke (reading): "Summer romances end for all kinds of reasons. But when all is said and done, they have one thing in common: They are shooting stars-a spectacular moment of light in the heavens, a fleeting glimpse of eternity. And in a flash, they're gone."

Duke (reading, about Noah): "He got the notion into his head that if he restored the old house where they had come that night, Allie would find a way to come back to him. Some called it a labor of love. Others called it something else. But in fact, Noah had gone a little mad."

Excerpt from a letter from Noah to Allie: "The best love is the kind that awakens the soul and makes us reach for more, that plants a fire in our hearts and brings peace to our minds. And that's what you've given me. That's what I'd hoped to give you forever."

noah- Would you stop thinking about what everyone wants? Stop thinking about what I want, what he wants, what your parents want. What do YOU want? What do you WANT?

I relate to both these films explicitly with this last relationship. I ain't going to have a female bashfest or anything but when it comes to women in the country I reside in presently, I'm thinking it's safe to say most of the female population isn't wearing Janko jeans, men's shirts, caps to the side, raisen their middle fingers in the air and representen thug life, they're not really down with girl power, I'm thinken they're down with flour power and man wins bread, woman makes bed. Which ain't power at all. Anyway's back to the art of tear jerking romance. I really shouldn't talk, I'm a drama queen, cough cough drama king. I like drama. I like falling in love, and chemistry, and appreciating the inside beauty of a person more so then the superficial outside beauty. And that shit totally goes against the laws of science here. Please remember the blog writer is not in america, he's from america, but he's not in america. It's important, their are lesbian and gay bars in america, none of that over here. You wouldn't be seeing any Rocky Horror Picture Shows going up in these parts. This is turning into a rant. And I'd like to avoid that until I get through all the movies that are in my topity top top top flickers of all time. Or until the change actually takes hold and my games tight again... Which blog readers it is far from.

So I was saying, the blog writer, which is I's, past relationship they're were a variety of qualities of both of these killer films that paralleled my own experience. And I ponder how much the female characters in both parallel a girls life experience. In Great Expectations Estella is taught by her aunt to be a bitch. Taught to hurt boys and take what she wants from them. I know a girl that was taught it's better to be a bitch then a doormat (but trust me the cycle countinues and she'll return to her doormat status). Now I can't imagine an aunt or mother being so bold to teach their neice or daughter to act that way but from conversation with my x or other female friends there's a limit to how much abuse a girl will take before she can teach herself that lesson. ANd boys are stupid and in a variety of ways less emotionally strong then women. We follow our heart often, too often when it comes to this dumb shmuck right here. Who has seen way too many of these chick flicks and isn't in fact a chick, go figure. I know a lot of dudes that totally separate between physical touch and emotions, I'm not them, so I guess that sucks for me. I am like Finn. I'm an artist, film writer, maker by trade and I'm sensitive. When I fall, I fall hard, and it's hard to get back the fuck up. Anyone get the plate number off that 5'5" brunette who loves music and travel? No :(

Anyway when in the business of falling in love or attempting to find the "one" or a "keeper" I've thought it's important to actually listen to the opposite sex. Try to understand them and with our first reference Great Expectations, Finn totally thinks I'm gonna win her heart by being a success. Do you actually win hearts that way? I'm asking seriously. Cause I think most of us stupid boys believe it. Not a hundred percent believe believe but a successful man with a personality and charm is better then a dirtbag with personality and charm, right? The really funny, but not really funny thing is that one line. "and like all happy endings,It was a tragedy, Of my device, for I succeeded" I've been there. You work and work and work and your goal is this kind of attention from someone and you get all this "success" from no ones. It's tradgic, but only you understand how tradgic it is. Instead of breaking out into that new platau of success and enlightenment and genuine people, you actually break into a new level of isolation and you gotta be extra skeptical of prospectable the "ones" cause higher up they know the game better then u do. I keep saying the game like I'm a player, but I've been benched for retardation, excuse my gimpy heart please, it makes it hard to run fast.

Okay on to the Notebook, whoever wrote this movie should be shot, like with a gun, cause, sigh, it's just so damn good and on point about things. The women in this country totally don't think for themselves. They think as a collective, mostly family, but easily influenced by everyone. It's kinda sorta really important to know what you want and to go after it. I've grown up thinking it's the most important, so I can avoid waking up when I'm 55 and asking where did my life go, where's my F'en oscar? I don't really want one but if the academy licks my balls I might let them give me one. Am I wrong here but the best love is the kind that awakens the soul and makes us reach for more. In my book that's the only kind of love worth having but I'm kind of a psycho drama king who needs constant challenges. It was like that, my most recent trip into the realm of love. Just like that, and just like the fight that Noah and Allie had, but in the end I think my x isn't strong enough to follow her heart, she's not made of that kinda independant fabric that is the backbone for the NY atitude.

Even though I felt things in these films, I'm starting to believe that the main reasons there are parallels is because my outspoken-ness was contagious and within a months time of not speaking to her she'll be completely comsumed by the way she thought before she met me. Why am I still thinking about this? I'm better today. I only got sad when I ate but it passed fairly quickly which I was very thankful for. So in retrospective or conclusion, Disappointment like great expectations is gonna happen, it's bound to. Cause bitches are never gonna understand real love. Yeah that's my conclusion, ya heard. And the notebook, well I might rewrite the script I based off her charachter and if I do that and have to concentrate again on what really makes her tick, my x, yeah I am gonna go mad, like madder then I am my worst day and I refuse to go back to that. But it's got all the elements of a story of love I wish I had..... everything except the really old nasty people making out, my tears of joy stopped at that moment and I booted into the popcorn.