Love is there if you want it to be. You just have to see that it's wrapped in beauty and hidden away in between the seconds of your life

P.S. I Love You (2007)
Holly Kennedy: What if this is it, Gerry? What if this is all there is to our life? You have to have a plan. Why do I have to be the responsible grown up who worries? Why can't I be the cute, carefree Irish guy who sings all the time?
Gerry Kennedy: Because you can't sing without making dogs bark?

Holly Kennedy: What do you think?
Daniel Connelly: I think you're hot!
Holly Kennedy: [gasps]
Daniel Connelly: Sorry, I have a syndrome.

Daniel Connelly: What do women want?
Holly Kennedy: [whispering] We have no idea what we want.
Daniel Connelly: I knew it!

Sharon McCarthy: You gotta be rich to be insane, Hol. Losing your mind is not a luxury for the middle class.

Patricia: I bet you've had a hard time walking into a room full of people on your own, right? Yeah. I know that. I know what it is not to feel like your in the room until he looks at you or touches your hand or even makes a joke at your expense, just to let everyone know... you're with him. You're his.

Patricia: So now, alone or not, you've got a walk ahead. Thing to remember is if we're all alone, then we're all together in that too.

Gerry Kennedy: Dear Holly, I don't have much time. I don't mean literally, I mean you're out buying ice cream and you'll be home soon. But I have a feeling this is the last letter, because there is only one thing left to tell you. It isn't to go down memory lane or make you buy a lamp, you can take care of yourself without any help from me. It's to tell you how much you move me, how you changed me. You made me a man, by loving me Holly. And for that, I am eternally grateful... literally. If you can promise me anything, promise me that whenever you're sad, or unsure, or you lose complete faith, that you'll try to see yourself through my eyes. Thank you for the honor of being my wife. I'm a man with no regrets. How lucky am I. You made my life, Holly. But I'm just one chapter in yours. There'll be more. I promise. So here it comes, the big one. Don't be afraid to fall in love again. Watch out for that signal, when life as you know it ends. P.S. I will always love you

Patricia: You know the worst thing for a parent... second after losing a child? Watching your child head for the same life you had. You can't stop it. It's a terrible, helpless feeling. Makes you angry all the time. And I've been angry. For a very long time. I'm exhausted.
Holly Kennedy: Do you think we'll ever see dad again?
Patricia: No sweetheart, never. So you have to stop waiting.

Cashback (2006)
Ben Willis: I've always wanted to be a painter, maybe have my work hung in a gallery one day.
Sharon Pintey: I've always wanted to meet a painter.
Ben Willis: Why?
Sharon Pintey: I think it might have something to do with their ability to see beauty in everything.

Ben Willis: Once upon a time, I wanted to know what love was. Love is there if you want it to be. You just have to see that it's wrapped in beauty and hidden away in between the seconds of your life. If you don't stop for a minute, you might miss it.

Ben Willis: You see, I've always wanted to be a painter, and like many artists before me, the female form has always been a great source of fascination. I've always been in awe of the power they posses.

Ben Willis: I read once about a woman whose secret fantasy was to have an affair with an artist. She thought he would really see her. He would see every curve, every line, every indentation and love them because they were part of the beauty that made her unique.

Ben Willis: I could feel a faint shift in a faraway place. A current of unknown consequences was on its way, moving towards me like an unstoppable wave of fate.

Ben Willis: Crush. It's funny how the same word for the feeling of disappointment can be used for the feeling of attraction. The Oxford English Dictionary states one of the meanings for the word crushed as "a strong and unreasoning, but transitory attachment."

Ben Willis: This is the haunting period. The time when the demons of regret come for you.

Ben Willis: I wanted to freeze time. I wanted to savor that moment, to live in that moment for a week. But I couldn't stop it, only slow it. And before I knew it, she was gone. After the door closed I felt like the last person on Earth.

Ben Willis: The bad news is that time flies. The good news... is that you're the pilot.


To be honest I'm thinking about returning to New York soon. There has been countless reasons flooding through my storm gates of late but the essential one and on the flipside a reoccurring group of nightmares that started in Cyprus have begun here. They are nostalgic demons and I don't have much reason to back them up. The main reason I believe I will head home is because I want something. Something I've always wanted. Someone. Someone to share this life with. And objectively attempting to look at myself I believe I had oppertuneties but alas at some places I lost them. I could say why I think I lost them but on the otherhand a man told me that I am faithfully fulfilling my own self defeating proficy and I'd rather not. I just wanna be happy for a while. I don't think that's asking too much and I don't know exactly how to achieve it but I know it's got something to do with keeping the people I love close. I've felt like I wanted to cry since November, but the tears just wouldn't come. I wonder, and in part my choice to move home, if I have supplemented and reinforced the things that make me tick so much that I walk away or turn my back on people cause it's a defense mechanism and I don't believe I can cure it myself. I'm gonna need assistance. I don't want to lose anyone anymore, at least if I can avoid it. I want company, and good conversation, and inspiration, and it has vanished completely. I find myself walking through endless streets and beaches and not speaking to a soul or meeting with people that I don't have a clue why I'm meeting them or conversing. I'm just lonely and it's like a never ending abyss sometimes. I've had these re-occurring nightmares about people I haven't spoken to in years, about x-girlfriends and I wake up still thinking I'm there lying with them on the couch or in my bed. I wake up sweating and disappointed that I didn't die in my sleep. This is depression.

I try to stay positive by telling myself to "stay positive". But with out warning in returns and makes me doubt everything about my life. It makes me wonder and sadens me to think this will keep countinueing, like I'll have a nice wave of confidence, meet some new people, feel and act like my old outgoing self for a bit, and then snap something or those people will change, the drama will start again, and I won't be able to keep it, even after I give in and compromise, it always pushes me to a place that I can't go and I'm sick of it. I'm sick of being alone when I just want to give more, but whatever that more is, it's just never enough, and the patience disappears. And all of a sudden the change is there. It's there in a fleeting moment. All of a sudden your not what you were to someone. All of a sudden the winds of change pick up the ground you were standing on whisk it away to a place that you can't follow. No matter how many times it happens, you never get used to it. It hurts just the same, everytime. I need help changing it. So home and therpy, even though I'm not a big fan, i think it's time.

It's comforting, but really not at the same time that people can feel things like loss and isolation enough to make films about them. I really appreciated Cashback's American Beautyesk way of describing the complete isolation and lonelyness. Unfortunetly I don't see anything romantic about being this lonely. Insomnia hasn't yielded any beauty for me, instead it usually heightens the insainity. Some creativeness has come from it. There are a variety of movies I've seen through the ages that completely signify the meaning hopeless romantic. Romance does exist. I see it all the time but to be a hopeless romantic, it means that your without hope for that thing and I think most "hopeless romantics" are very deeply attached to the fantasy that they will achieve that greatness with a soulmate or significant other who is yet to be seen. There is another movie I'd recommend that I just saw called "broken english". An old man speaks with our heroin, and tells her you should decide if u want the romance or a marriage or if u want magic. The first two, easily availible but the latter, you must have patience and love yourself.

These fleeting moments, breaths, words, texts, and feelings exchange
A second there, a minute later, and the decades whisp whispers of a previous life
They, like dusty texts tell stories of old
Tales of fantasy
The flagrant fragrance is a memory too familiar of past
In present the air between us is frozen like a dvd with scratches on it
The picture so clear but without a flinching clip of what once was
Bliss in a wrapped light filled frame entrenched deep within those eyes
How far have I journeyed in search of it's likeness
How far can I travel once more in it's quest
Fruitless this drought of unquenched, uninhabitable, unfamiliar landscapes
He grows old in his ages
He is ripe with regret
Sturdy with maturity
Securely independant
Surviving
He blames himself in misery, isolation, and grief
But in company blames others
Is he at fault
Can he reconcil
Is there redemption, renewal, or rebirth
Or simply more of a toiled contemptious game that like his empty beating heart refuses to quit
Will he find hope again
It is uncertain and as time trickles on, it's uncertainty plagues every echo in every corridor
Till silence and silence alone is the only thing he knows to depend on
This silence is like many things all to well to explain
The noiceless music enters and fades in beautiful orchestrial poetry that brings him back
Back to places that were meant to rot
Returned, not by choice but by habit or sub-consicousness to realms and nightmares of previous chapters
Chapters like collegiate texts meant to be read and reread and studied and noted but not really noteable
Segments of a bigger picture that unlike hollywood this novel could surely end unhappily
If reason could overpower the tricks and trade of habit she would surely fly through these chapters
Skimming them for plot points or subject but not looking so deep into them to say there is a subtext or something overlooked
But this age and these feelings return like vengeful spirits, constantly, without warning, when to rest in peace would be key
There is no sleep for their kind and like the chill winter air it tosses pages back to already read pages and all too often slams down upon the dusty desk
Reminisant of time and place and love and hate and connection with pretention, with ressurection of confession
This book is not the kind of text which wishes him to see the end
It wishes him to stop reading and return
There's no descency of reading the first ten pages and then the last ten
No spark notes to give up all that has happened or will happen
It requires the reader to read not at their own leasure but read for the books entertainment
Like a mythological greek god toying for their own amusement
It tires him to no end
The reader stops reading and begs for an ending spoiler
Please just give away the ending
But it will not
The ending will not reveil itself
Instead they read or are reread, never changing but always denying forgiveness
They claim hold of the readers unflawful attempt to understand the hero's flaws in attaining or what has been read so far, unsuccessful attempts at attaining what he truly wants
It could be unattainable
This could be the type of story where the unflinching human spirit is denied by his stubbern lack of adapting soul
Is it worth reading on

Okay the epiphany drunken stas, you are a child, u need attention and affection and you come up with new and inovative ways to recieve it. Why it never works is cause sooner or later you figure that out and it's not enough to just get it, you want more. You want love, affection, understanding, patience, compassion, independance, integrity, and hope, passion and inspiration, loyalty and expansion, you want a thing like magic and after the magic has died, you want that hope or possibility of it being rebirthed in not only the cuddling romantic love, but in life. In the day to day challenges. You are insecure, you can speak the other thing, like a con artist, like a salesman, which is the why anybody has been interested so far, and essentially the reason why you can get interest but not keep it indefinitely. Your weak in the sense that other independant strong people that want things, if they don't include you, you get insecure and walk away. Because you believe that they don't need you. Your reason is that rationably, reasonably, they will not see you as the one for them. And that makes you insecure, especially if you believe they are the one for you, for life. You can't figure out how to fix it. Hey I don't know either! I cry for u, but not out loud. Anyway there just maybe no need for an emotional male, your original thinking that you can never be honest about everything, especially your feelings, i think your right, when your looking for it. You'll catch something, not literally, but metaphorically, and it don't want that part of u, it wants the man. The man within that don't show it. That's what she's looking for. STOP POISENING YOURSELF!HEY listen ummm they will be interested in having a you, but that you ain't the you you thought they are interested in having, now what you gotta ask yourself is the you that you think you fell in love with is truly the you that you think you fell in love with and if so are they actually infactually interested in you, like the real you past the love, are they interested in the you that you know you can be, and are, or the fantasy of who you could be without. It's a rough ass question, cause getting them ain't about who u are, getting them is about who u could be to them, is that the same thing as who u want to be or in fact who u are?